If you’ve read Waiting is Not Easy! by Mo Willems, then you already feel the deep, emotional struggle of waiting as dramatized by our beloved Elephant and Piggie. One of my favorite children’s books, seriously. And if you’ve ventured out into the world with young kids, you really get it. Waiting is not just not easy; it feels like a lifelong test of survival. Spoiler alert? This is also very true if you’re a parent.
Many of you can relate that our kids, despite being absolute gems in many ways, are not born with infinite patience. Shocker, right? When you find yourselves in line at your favorite coffee shop or the grocery store, you’d think they were being asked to climb Everest. The fidgeting, the complaints, the endless “Why is it taking soooo long?” can turn into a soundtrack. When it came to waiting their turn during board games? Oh, the debates about fairness! And those lingering minutes (or hours, as they would have you believe) as they sat through their sibling’s activities, living in boredom.
Waiting isn’t just a struggle in public places, either. Visits to the doctor’s office can be another patience-testing battleground. From the tiny chairs in the waiting room to the seemingly endless time spent flipping through outdated magazines, can be an ordeal. And road trips? Oh boy. Have you ever heard, “Are we there yet?” on repeat? Long stretches between snacks and pit stops are enough to turn even the calmest of kids into wiggly, restless messes..
Turns out, patience is not an innate talent. It’s a skill. Like tying shoes or learning multiplication tables, it takes practice. And in our family, we learned that tackling patience in the middle of a bustling Target checkout line probably wasn’t the best starting point. Instead, we needed a game plan.
The Waiting Workout: Practicing at Home
If there’s one thing I learned, it’s that teaching kids to wait requires a little creativity and a whole lot of practice in a low-stakes environment. Enter what I call “contrived waiting.” Nope, that’s not a fancy parenting buzzword—I literally made it up, at least I think I did. It’s essentially setting up practice opportunities at home, when you’re not wearing down the nerves of the people standing behind you in line.
We started small. Picture this: I’d set out a tray of cookies and declare, “We’ll have a cookie break in five minutes!” Their first reactions were as you’d expect. Attempted negotiations. Light protesting. But I stayed firm, throwing out distractions (books, jokes, random trivia about the Fresh Beat Band) while the seconds ticked on. Then voilà! Cookies, delivered with a side of high-fives for surviving the wait.
Next came games. Games are golden for patience-building because they naturally require turn-taking and a little self-restraint. During family rounds of Uno or Go Fish, we focused on being silly but serious about waiting. “Your turn is coming! What’s your strategy? Do you have a secret card ready?” The goal was to keep the vibe light and engaging while they got used to the idea that waiting their turn wasn’t as terrible as it seemed.
We even practiced mock waiting scenarios. For example, I’d set up a pretend doctor’s office at home with chairs lined up and an “appointment” schedule. While waiting for their “name” to be called, we read books, played “I Spy,” or took turns being the receptionist. Practicing with controlled, fun waiting times gave them tools to handle the real thing.
From Home to Real Life
Once we had a bit of practice under our belts, it was time for the real deal. Long lines at the coffee shop? I started arming myself (and my daughters) with tools to make the experience more manageable. For us, that meant always having a tiny “waiting bag” handy. Think miniature mazes, a pocket-sized notebook for doodles, and yes, a short supply of madeleines for emergencies. Confession, once in a while it was my phone, but this was the exception, not the rule.
We learned to use conversation as a distraction during the wait. I’d ask questions like, “If you could build an ice cream flavor, what would it be?” or “Which superpower would help in this line right now?” or a good game of I Spy often helped. It didn’t magically shrink the line, but it did limit the complaints and waiting became second nature to them.
We made road trips interactive. Constant music (they got to choose) and to keep things fun, we started using car games like “20 Questions,” the license plate game, or a family favorite, “Name as Many ______ as You Can in 60 Seconds!”
And those sibling activities that ran on endlessly (in their eyes)? We worked on using the time productively. Want to bring a coloring book? Great. Maybe practice telling me three interesting things about your day while we wait? You bet. One time, my daughter even used the “boring downtime” to map out her dream treehouse, complete with a secret slide. What became fun is as they got older they enjoyed similar things, cheered each other on and even did activities together!
The Ongoing Journey of Patience
What I’ve learned is that patience doesn’t come naturally to most of us—not kids and not adults either. But it’s something we can build, step by step, snack by snack, and wait by wait. And when I think back to Elephant and Piggie, it turns out Mo Willems says it best in Waiting is Not Easy! After all the struggle, Elephant Gerald finally gets it. “This was worth the wait,” he says.
And you know what? It really is.
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